I can't whistle: celebrating

photo by the amazingly lovely Susan Mullen (www.susanmullenphotography.com)

Today we are celebrating 3 years of wedded bliss

(Thank you, my love. I would do it all over again.)

This has been such a hard week.
It is so hard to hold on to what is good and right in the face of horror and tragedy.
It is do hard to remember LOVE when fear and sadness are so very present.
It is so hard to dig down deep and stay connected to the very best in ourselves and each other.
It is hard work.
But it is, perhaps, the most important work we do.

Many folks have been much more eloquent than I can imagine being.
But I do wish with all my heart: Peace, healing, resolution.

About this blog

I started this blog during struggles with infertility--struggles that resulted in countless IUIs, medications, procedures, 5 attempted IVF cycles, 2 pregnancies, one heartbreaking loss, and one miracle baby.

Parenthood left me feeling like I was not sure what to do here, with this amazing community. To talk about parenting felt boastful for those still and forever struggling. To not talk about it felt disingenuous. So here I am. I want to talk about my real life. Parenting. Midlife reassessment. Flailing. Finding myself. Mucking about.

So yes, I am a midlife parent of an amazing child.
Yes, I battled infertility and will be forever changed by every single moment of that journey.
I am imperfect and life is messy, but it is also so beautiful.

Among many other things, I hope to reconnect to myself through writing here. And I hope to connect with you too. Others out there, parenting maybe later in life. Maybe after struggling. Maybe struggling still. We can all use a safe place and a lot of compassion. That's what I am offering to you. I hope you'll stick around.

inside out

"The key is, starting from the inside out. Often you say, “I don’t know what to do.” True, you don’t know what to do. There are infinite possibilities. And a bunch of them haven’t worked for you. A lot of them have been tried, and they haven’t worked under what you think are the same conditions. And so, you sort of pace around, you don’t know what to do. Sometimes you don’t even know what you want to have. But you always, you always, if you will stop and think about it, you ALWAYS know how you want to feel."

--Abraham

I can't whistle

17 April 2013

celebrating

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