15 January 2011

some baby pictures and reflections




A year ago (how is this possible?), I was beginning the last-chance-no-really-this-time-I-mean-it IVF cycle that ended with Della. I drove the route to Waltham on thursday, bringing a friend to a Dr down that way... I waved as I passed the clinic, simply amazed at what a difference a year makes.

This year I find myself mired in gutwrenching workstress and transitions, when all I want is to just simply revel in this beautiful baby and this truly miraculous turn of events. I don't want to be struggling with anything, you know? It is just very hard to let go of such a big (enormous) piece of my life and source of identity.

Every chance I get, I take a deep breath, re-center, refocus, gather myself, look at this amazing person and KNOW where my priorities are. NO matter what else is happening right now, coming apart or in the midst of the messy act of creation, this is exactly where I want to be.

I might continue to be a bit sporadic here while some of my bedrock comes apart and I allow myself at last to truly create a life that supports my heartwork, so I wanted to leave you with some images to tide you over for a bit.

Yes, she really is this cute.


20 comments:

sprogblogger said...

Oh she is so beautiful! Fantastic pictures, too - I have yet to master the 'baby photography' part of my life, but it looks like you got it.

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

She is looking more like you!

Unfortunately knowing where your heart's priorities are isn't always compatible with paying the bills, securing health insurance, and all of those boring necessities.

I hope that all that junk works itself out. I know that Della is working herself out just fine, and that her mama (and papa) will do the same with her guidance.

Oh and despite being almost a full year younger, Della's hair is already longer than Tamale's!

Nic said...

She is adorable!
I am sorry everything is so stressful. I hope things get a little easier for you. X

Eileen said...

She is GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I must meet you both some time the next time I am back east! So happy for you!!!

Joannah said...

Thank you for posting these pictures! She's a treat to behold.

I hope everything falls into place soon, and you can find the balance you need between work and family.

:)

What IF? said...

Such a beautiful little girl, your Della. Love the smiles!
Thank you for sharing these photos with us. I hope everything work-related in your life comes together soon too. Here's to a 2011 with less stress and more fulfillment.

Kate said...

Loving the beautiful smiles!

Somethingtogrow said...

What a beauty!

alyssa said...

love!

Eb 40+ said...

good lord women, what a cutie!!

karen alonge said...

!!!!!!!!!!!!
cute as can be.
I could just eat her up.
I've been checking every day hoping for some pics.

thinking of you with confidence that life is taking good care of you and will continue to do so.

xo

musicmakermomma said...

Della is so sweet! Lovely pix. I can't believe you have come so far, it seems amazing to think back over the past few years. I'm just starting (again!) my last chance no this time I really mean it cycle. Hope mine turns out as well!

linda said...

She is sweetness personified! What a love. I'll bet you're pinching yourself every day....I know I would! :-)

Emily Erin said...

What a doll-- thanks for sharing! Will be holding good thoughts for you as the work thing continues to take shape.

Michele said...

gorgeous!!! in every way!!!

KathyB said...

What a happy, well-loved baby. Love the swirly curls on top.

lilpudge said...

My sweet dear friend ...

Jenn here....I truly apologize that I have been unable to keep in touch with you directly although I have quietly followed the blog and your journey all this time. (couldn't help myself)

Kate, my heart has overflowed with joy and happiness everytime I looked at the amazing creation that is Della. She is beautiful, and yes amazingly cute!

Although I know that you are struggling with work and that part of your identity, I know you are doing the right thing in following your heart.

After all -I believe your "best heartwork" is showcased in these pics of Della.

Love ya hon!
Jenn-Barren,Broken & Beginning again
(www.lilpudgeloses.blogspot.com)

Sprogblgger's mom said...

Dear Kate,

Oh my! What an absolutely gorgeous little darling you have!

Thanks for sharing the wonderful pictures.
Love, S

IF Optimist, then... said...

NOM NOM NOM NOM. She is Dellaitefull and Dellaicious and Wondellaful. Gawd I lurve her name and she is a cutie beyond measure. Sending a hug for you and a nuzzle for her. I bet she smells good too. ;-)

Jem said...

She is wicked cute! I love the hair sticking up and the gleam in her eye. She already knows, doesn't she?