12 September 2011


Della's third bottom tooth erupted yesterday, along with two big developmental steps--Della spent the day rather suddenly pulling up one handed and then shocked us by walking with daddy while he held only one of her hands.

We went to the fair, met pigs, chickens, ducks, bunnies, cows, horses and a seriously cute mini burro. Della also met fried dough. YUM.

Before I forget, there are so many things I want to say-- things that have helped, things that didn't...
Aveeno unscented diaper cream. Thick, unscented totally.... works. UNSCENTED> Hurrah!
Pampers sensitive swaddlers.... no disney characters, and they work *fine*. I get mine via Amazon Mom and have a subscription. I wanted to choose differently for the earth, but this is what is working for us right now and we can't (I can't) afford trial and error.
For me-- all breast pads suck. I finally got pull over sleep bras from Medela, 20 bucks each, and wear them with bamboo or cotton breast pads that look like I've stuffed pancakes in my bra. For work I wear a more structured bra that does not show the pads, and I simply remove the whole thing to pump using a pumping bra (fembot).
At night, I leak like mad, sometimes sleep bra-free just to have less to deal with but nearly always regret the sopping dripping wetness of it all.
Baby stuff we bought and wasted money on: mechanical swing, she just did not take to it. Maybe the crib? we'll see. it was cheap and maybe it will get use. I hope so.
Soft toys. MOMMA like soft toys. DELLA likes things that rattle, crinkle, make music, noise....
Clothes: she is now in shirts and pants, all cotton jersey or soy (sales on diaper.com!).... no onesies. She is robust not lanky so this is working best for us right now. Barefeet rule. Her first real shoes arrived today via Zappos amazing overnight delivery. Soft soled and I will let daycare decide when they want them on her. For now, i want her barefoot as often as possible for kinesthetic feedback, balance and walking.

Kate stuff: the in between body has been a very interesting journey and no doubt will continue to be pretty amazingly weird. I am trying not to buy things for this in between place but have needed bras (got cheap ones from hanes at walmart that work fine), needed pants for work (kohl's dockers), and am simply going to go with t shirts/tanks and cardigans for the foreseeable future. Things that fit and are comfortable are really important to me. My goal is to be unconscious of what I am wearing-- somehow achieve comfort+ appropriateness.
I was wearing maternity T shirts to cover/disguise The Belly but they are now way too big and just look bad. Shirts are still a problem for me.
I hoarded one pair of maternity pants, white jeans I love, but now the waist band feels thick and weird (which it should). But I cannot quite part with them yet.
I moved a button on a pair of jeans. This felt like progress. My weight is pre-preg but my shape is something very foreign.
Motherhood has given me everchanging breasts, but still no butt. Alas.

I wash my hair every two or three days, have it up in a barette most of the time. Floss every few days. I try to shower each day, even if it just is a rinse, and try to shave since apparently that is what sets me apart from the animals. That and cover-up.
I totally see how easy it would be to give in, give up. Stretchy pants, slept in shirts.. I walked today in my sleep outfit. But when I got home I made myself change. I think FOR ME it is important to feel as if I am "ready", which, when possible means clean teeth, deoderant, and fresh undies. When possible, it also means clothes I don't mind being seen in.

Now that I am in an apartment, folks just come to the door. Odd to be sprawled post nursing with a sleeping baby and have someone just suddenly be there. Not my favorite thing.

Pumping: I bought a medela pump on super sale but god damn it was expensive...and I still use it. I am glad I spent the money on it even though it and I are not friends. I bought a hand pump as a backup and had to use it once and I hated it completely. I have decided for sanity to pump only once a day--feed before and immediately upon returning home. I read or do work on a mini laptop while pumping. I pump in a bathroom (I did in my last job too) and it just rots. Reading/working helps a lot. Also Lynda.com is amazing for on-line learning for 25$/month unlimited access to training videos for SW and a lot of great documentaries that I hope to watch someday.

Feeding: We are still using the small medela bottles and slow flow nipples. I have med flow to try this week maybe. I will be mixing breast milk with formula, thank you What IF for the affirming suggestion! Della does not drink more than 4 oz per feeding since she is really about solids too--so we've never needed bigger bottles. I keep seeing babies drinking from them and worried (over and over) that maybe I am doing something wrong. A 22lb baby says things are fine.

New in-between car seat comes this week. I'll let you know if I like it at all once it is here. I interviewed many in real life at babys r us and gosh darn, do they HAVE to be so hard?
I am pretty sure this will not solve Della's hatred of being in the car. But it will solve the "she is too big for her baby bucket" problem if it works out.

I still have multifaceted envy but will write more about this in a different post. I met someone's newborn yesterday and felt that twinge, you know the one... and I thought goddamn it! Really? Still?
Apparently, yes. Still. Damn it.


It Is What It Is said...

Not sure how you feel about silicone, but I benefited greatly from using the Lily Padz nursing pads. Here they are:
http://www.amazon.com/Lily-Padz-Reuseable-Nursing-Pads/dp/B000YOUIN6. They are like a Diva Cup for lactating breasts :)

sprogblogger said...

So good to hear from you--I have MISSED you! We'll definitely find a way to get together this fall. Now that the bebes are old enough to actually (maybe?!) enjoy each other's company, we should make it happen, because I KNOW how much I enjoy yours. Be well, my friend, you've been through so much this year, and I hear your voice starting to come back, even stronger than before.

Can't wait to see you!

Joannah said...

I know that feeling, Kate. I realize that everything with Michaela is a once in a lifetime event. There will never be another baby. This isn't what I thought life would hold for me ten or twenty years ago. I think there's some grieving that has to take place in situations like ours.

Della is beautiful! What a sweet little face. :)

Anonymous said...

Hi! This is your reader from Portland. Good to read this! If you don't like unsolicited advice, maybe skip my comment, for some reason I had a lot to say...

Have you tried the Danish Woolen Delight wool breast pads? They were the only thing that worked for me. At night I put Lansinoh paper pads inside of them sometimes if I thought a lot of leaking would happen. But they work well on their own, too.

I quit pumping a while back even though I work. It was too much torture for me. I still make enough to nurse my girl, since she eats food too (one year old now), and my pediatrician gave me a recipe for goat's milk formula if I needed to supplement. If you want it, I can send it to you. But of course it is a fine thing to use regular formula if that's going well.

If it's still there, there is an "Ocean State Job Lots" shop in your town...maybe that would be good for some cheap stuff for the apartment that you can pitch when you move.

OK--enough unaskedfor advice! What is wrong with me. You are doing great. Glad to hear from you and can totally relate to the weird breasts/no butt angst. I thought I would be sure to come out of this with one of those.


Kate said...

Theh soft toy love will come. Took K till about 15mo to really be interested in them. Now she is all about her "babies" (teddies, dolls). She'd better like them, because I have a ton of them that I've collected for future children over the years!
I think my body finally got back to closer to original form. It sure takes a lot of time, and maybe I just got really lucky.
Don't worry about the small bottles. K never moved off small medela bottles with slow-flow nipples. And she's 26.6lb at almost 18mo. I don't think you need to worry that Della's not getting enough milk! If she's not frustrated by the slow flow, don't worry about it.