11 February 2009

42

I had a dream last night that Angela of fluid pudding fame gave birth to a child somehow magically conceived by my partner and myself even though there was no way that particular child could have been a mix of us-- and I spent a good portion of the night being acutely envious of her pregnancy and birthing experience, and watching her hold the little one. Then finally, I was holding him while he slept, and it was amazing to feel the softness of his skin, and I kept rubbing my cheek against his head, feeling a big intense mixture of amazement, fear since I had no idea what to do with this tiny magnificent being, and such acute sorrow.

I woke with the ghost of a memory of his hair against my skin, and a deep sense of awe.

I am 42 today.

9 comments:

Grade A said...

I can only see this as a good omen. A baby will get to your hands, even if you don't know how right now.

Hope the pill is treating you gently.

Joannah said...

Happy birthday! I hope this will be the year in which all your dreams come true.

:-)

littlebitofsomething said...

happy birthday!

Ashley said...

Happy Birthday!!

bb said...

Happy Birthday! and wow what a dream. I hope it is a good sign for things to come for you.

April said...

Hi. I had a creepy interaction today and needed to change blogs. Transitioning to a new site that I don't want to publish on my blog: http://strongblonde.wordpress.com/

:)

Elle said...

Happy Birthday!

Mine's tomorrow. :)

And my birthday wish for you is for you to be holding a baby when you turn 43.

Maredsous said...

Kate! Happy Birthday. How did you let it sneak up without any mention.

Have faith. You will be able to experience that deep sense of awe. Persistence always wins out.

What IF? said...

Happy belated birthday, Kate. I hope you were able to do something on your birthday that feeds your soul. Re: your plan - 19 days may not seem like a lot of time to others, but I know that every day spent waiting sucks profoundly. Hang in there.

Thank you for the lovely message you left on my blog.