I cannot thank you all enough for reading and lurking, commenting and sending such love and hope and support and positive energy--I cannot imagine how I would have made it without you and this amazing community.
Thank you, truly, deeply and humbly.
Something I have learned about fear from my baby daughter:
Gas pains** bring rigid body wailing, heart wrenching howling cries, tears and gasping, then a moment later, it is over, peace reigns, her face goes calm, she nurses, body relaxed.
She is not holding fear it will come again, or maintaining the pain by holding on to the memory of how bad it was. She is just simply being.
Me? I am a creature of dread and habit, of emotional regurgitation and an infinite capacity for replaying discomfort...
I have so much to learn.
**all hail the mylecon drops