12 June 2010

new things

Thursday afternoon I left work when my hours were up, which felt so odd and off. I felt so sad leaving, not like WHOO HOO but dang.

I'd been feeling some odd low pressure all day. Finally called the doc who instructed me to drink lots of water and lie on my left side-- so I did, and I took it easy physically yesterday and tried to drink more, but I still feel off-- thankfully no contractions, no bleeding or increased discharge, just an odd low heaviness and a feeling like all of my low down muscles and tendons are vaguely to moderately pissed off. So I am basically forcing liquids, doing kegels (all this pressure down makes me want to do everything I can to pull everything back up)-- and just trying to take it easy. When I move, (stand/walk) everything feels more off.

Yesterday was my first work-for-myself friday and I headed "downtown" to revel in high speed wifi to get my Linkedin summary written and posted, and then to work on my new website. But after writing the summary, I realized I could not connect, so home again to upload (better slow than none) and then do website work. I hate wordpress. I'm just sayin'. I am pretty sure they could make it less user friendly by, say, requiring me to use unix (grep, I say, grep). So, anyway, in some ways it is good to go slowly since my brain has time to multitask-- what do I want of this new endeavor? how do I present it and to whom?
So after some thinking, I bought 3 months of sponsorship on BohoGirl's blog starting in July (see? must have something ready to share with the world by then!)-- and worked on my button:
And also worked on my much-less-fun header, and tried to understand what I can and cannot do with the site. I have a friend who will help me for real, but I wanted a placeholder... so...

so it was a very productive day in the directions of workwork and heart-work, and I feel good about that.
But it was so dang odd.

I drove up north today, up early early, to donate my left over medications to my old clinic. I met with my sweet nurse, Sharon, and we had a great visit. When last she and I were in touch I wanted to cycle just one more time and she was the one to tell me they wouldn't. And it took a long time for my wounds to heal enough to be in touch...time and the fine distraction that is success.

Today is all gentle rain and low raggedy clouds, the woods are so green and lush with new growth (every single tiny ending of every single branchlet on every hemlock is bright green with an inch or two of new needles)-- it is so lovely.

Feet up
Cat on my shins,
computer on my lap
the little one is wiggling and poking
Week 20 tomorrow, halfway-- a simply astonishing fact.

...time to get back to work.


jill said...

Happy 20 weeks :) I hope that low pressure thing that's going on gets better quickly.

So glad to hear your anatomy scan went well (from a couple posts back) - wonderful news!

Anonymous said...

I have been following your blog for a long time and wanted to offer some insight on the low pressure. I am exactly 20weeks and 5 days pregnant today and the pressure and off-feeling in the tendons etc. sounds like my symptoms. The doc said it was most likely round ligament pain which kicks in around this time. I am having almost the same things (with the addition of braxton-hicks and some stabbing pains in the nether regions). So, relax and they should lessen in a couple of days.

Kate said...

Hope the weird feeling passes. I had some real heavy icky feelings "down there" mid pg, and look how I turned out.
Glad you're finding new directions with your new project - wish you much success!
And I'm so glad your old clinic didn't let you cycle just one more time, because obviously you were meant to go elsewhere for that last cycle to reach where you are today. Still so happy you're about halfway there!

B. said...

While I was pregnant, I worried about my baby's position and was directed by my midwife to the spinning babies web site. There's one "exercise" that involves knees on the couch/elbows on the floor/head down which magically lifts the baby off those low-down places that aren't used to carrying much weight. I forget how often they suggest doing it, but it is supposed to give the baby the chance to flip or spin in order to get into the right position for late-pregnancy and birth. The web site is a bit disjointed, but very interesting and helpful.

Happy halfway!! So happy to read that things continue to go well on the baby front. And the work situation sounds like it's become a wonderful opportunity- hurray!

Be well!

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

The button looks great.

Happy 20 weeks!

Barefoot said...

20 weeks -- unbelievable! I hope the fluids and rest help you to feel better soon.

IVF 40+ said...

Happy 20 weeks!! If you're worried about anything baby related I say demand an ultrasound. I've noticed with the healthcare providers in this country that they never offer but won't resist a demand from a patient.

Hope all feels better soon.

Anonymous said...

Happy Half Way Day! You're so amamzing and beautiful, more so every week I see you. I'm so happy to be able to share this time with you!


Michele said...

hope the feeling passes- I know that's scary.

and I love your design!

It is what it is said...


I am not sure when your next ultrasound is scheduled, but I highly encourage you to have cervical ultrasound sooner rather than later. It might give you peace of mind to know that the low heaviness is not related to your cervix (and this is coming from someone with an incompetent one, cervix that is).