-1

So today is a day of acupuncture with my favorite needle guy.

Spotting continues but it is the old brown of insult or injury not the new pink/red of hmmm something happening.

I started to focus my worry on induction- sometimes when I am scared about things (plural) I find a piece I can focus on that seems to embody the whole thing, and that is where my attention starts to settle and coalesce.

But in this case there are two worries, right? one is induction which I hate even thinking about (see point 1 above)

and the other which eclipses all else, is the worry that something bad will happen. More in a moment.

So yeah. After a pep talk with my sister I feel vaguely better- and have the beginning of a plan.

For my sanity MAYBE, we are thinking that if monday's check is fine, MAYBE in spite of my induction fear we will MAYBE ask for an induction at the end of next week. Otherwise all I will do is worry that Something Bad Will Happen to the baby between now and birth and folks? I cannot handle that.

I may change my mind a million more times, but to have the ghost of a plan makes me feel like I am doing something, saying to the universe that I am ready, and I need to avoid calamity.

So

I called my acupuncture guy yesterday afternoon and set up an appointment that I will leave for shortly

and he will see me again monday, then every day until the baby comes however that unfolds. Perhaps the best use of credit card plastic I can think of--

Emily Erin asked about the nursery--I have a photo I cannot find at the moment.

This little house came decked out in brightly colored interior paint-- pea green hallway, purple baby's room, kitchen with pea green and Yellow, living room pumpkin, blue bedroom... not much room, but high ceilings and bright colors and it felt like falling into a crayon box when I saw it.

So the baby's room began as "the purple room"-- a dark purple so dark it was midnightish--so we lightened it up by half, painted the trim white and I started buying art from Etsy to try to tell the universe I was ready for a baby (this was as we began "trying"). Time passed- the room filled with garbage/storage stuff.... we excavated, and began again. Repeat.

The room is now ready-- filled only with baby stuff- a bassinet that my mom slept in, some shelves that Doug made, Target bins, art, and space for the desk/changing table that Doug is making. We also have a crib waiting in the mudroom closet, and a fold up sleeper thingy we will use by the bed in our room.

I'll find the photo sometime and post it.

But now? Must run and go get needled.

It is a gorgeous day. I hope to walk.