17 March 2010

assumingallgoeswell

Thank you thank you for your happy wishes and hurrahs and congratulations.
I am so very happy.
Yes, me, happy.
My 36 hours has extended itself magically thanks to my body being clearly under the influence.
My body cooperating with loads of sensations and daily changes (breasts feel odd and heavy today, belly bloated enough to be only in fat pants these days, low level cramping is common)
Nausea still coming and going with loads of lower level ick for hours at a time.
fatigue is insane and this morning I woke blue, knowing that unless I could sleep all day, it was never going to be enough.

Next ultrasound scheduled for monday morning (8w1d) in Brookline, so another sleepover sunday night. Gosh I hope this time we will sleep.
then
(assumingallgoeswell)
get this
I made an OB appointment. With ultrasound (I begged shamelessly). April 5th. week 10.
How's that for spitting in the face of the devil.
(she says, throwing salt, turning counterclockwise, and walking backwards all michael-jackson moonwalk style)

scared out of my wits that this will end.
excited that maybe it won't.

The NP on monday told me to find an OB that she had a good feeling about this, to just choose and make an appointment. I think she could tell I wanted to cling to her leg (and an ultrasound machine) until week 12. LaraNoodle, the wonderful NP is the one who did my ouchie sonohystogram, and I think she is really great. I liked her a lot both times. I see her again monday and feel I am in good hands.

someday here people, it would be the coolest thing ever to be able to NOT always qualify everything I say or think with
ifallgoeswell
as if I am tempting the devil.

I just want it to
just
go
well.

And I would like Mo and Maredsous to get (and stay) pregnant too please. And Nic during her first IVF this summer.
Then there could be peace in the universe.

11 comments:

Lara (NoodleGirl) said...

Yay! So happy you're feeling confident enough to throw salt! I'm sure you want an OB closer to home, but if you were still looking to come into Boston for your pg healthcare, I adore my OB, she is the nicest woman in the world. She's actually located in the exact same building in Brookline as BIVF. But I'm sure you can find an awesome one closer to home too ;).

Jules a.k.a. Julie said...

I'm glad things are going well and sending positive thoughts that they continue to go wonderfully! You deserve this, Kate!

Jen said...

Just came across your blog, I am 5weeks preg at 42 years old. Had one miscarriage back in 2004. I didn't go down the road of infertilty drugs though, so I can't imagine what that is like. Nice to find another woman my age going through a pregnancy in her 40's. I have alot of the same feelings as you do, don't want to get too excited like waiting for that other shoe to drop. I go for my 2nd internal u/s next Friday at the end of my 6 week...keeping fingers crossed and trying to stay positive day by day.

robin said...

So, so glad all is going well and that you feel like crap -yay!. This is the kind of entry I read and float away from all smiley and sure that I'll have this one day too. You are pregnant. Isn't that sweet?

sprogblogger said...

Good for you - in all senses of that phrase. And, if it's tempting fate to say things, and to plan without the disclaimer, then perhaps it's just as valid to say that your joy is an important part of this, too, just as much as is your fear. I hope you get some joyful moments that are not nausea related, and I'm very much looking forward to your good news after 8w ultrasound!

An OB appointment - you pregnant lady, you!

Nic said...

I am pleased you are feeling happy! Yay for the PG signs, as unplesant as they can be, they are definitely reasuring!
I really hope you can enjoy this pregnancy, hope it all goes uneventful.
Good luck for your ultrasound!
Take care
Nic x
p.s. thanks very much for the well wishes, it menas a lot to me
x

babyinterrupted said...

I feel very much the same way, constantly alternating between hopeful and scared. And then hopeful. And then scared. I made an appt with the OB a few weeks ago and crossed my fingers while I made it; they sent the pre-appt paperwork the next day and I didn't fill it out until after the ultrasound on Monday. Good God, I am screwed up. :) But glad you have another ultrasound on Monday! Sending lots of good thoughts for another great photo moment. :)

Mina said...

Glad everything is going well, lady! :)

IF Optimist, then... said...

I'm so happy that you are getting the yucks and the tireds and the heavy boobage signs. Sending wishes and joyful magic for more great news on Monday. I recommend getting an OB you really love, but not too far distance. Being able to come in without hours of traffic hassle has been wonderful. I picked my hospital first, based on their level 3 NICU and well regarded maternity center with some of the most praised post natal classes in the area. Once I chose the hospital, I researched which doctors and practices were allowed to deliver there. Picking an OB was exciting and I got a really great lady. :-) Blowing a kiss due East. -- Traci

B. said...

If you need to shake up the wording a bit, there's a saying similar to "ifallgoeswell" in a Middle Eastern language (some guy I used to work with was trying to solicit a project in Iran, so he said it a lot)- inchala (spelled phonetically here), meaning "god willing," or something akin to that.

I'm thrilled too for all your continued symptoms. May they not abate until you feel movement (mine started at about week 18). And yes, Mo and Nic, and Maredsous should be next. Let's all have something to celebrate this year!

Michele said...

Just so overjoyed for you... PRaying for peace!