20 March 2010

checking in

hey there
remember me? small, fuzzy redhead?
yeah well. I have been in survival mode- sorry to be so quiet on the 'net, sorry to be so internal. I feel as if every iota of my energy is being spent and at night, I feel like complete shit. I lie in bed, hoping to sleep before I barf (no barfing yet), and then, after a few hours of insanedreamsleep, I wake up. and I am AWAKE.

For HOURS.

WTF?

I am just not finding I have much extra.
Tomorrow, we head back to Brookline for the night for the ultrasound on Monday. I have every hope that it will be fine and will be completely shocked if otherwise. This is good and bad, right? Good in that I inthismoment feel things are ok- since I feel so lousy. Bad in that if anything is wrong, I'll be totally shocked and blindsided.
Focusing on the good.
The twinging uterus, the weird transient sensations in my breasts and the swelling and bizarro queasiness that then vanishes.. and oh, the profound and utter fatigue....
yeah baby, please be in there, heart beating beating beating...

11 comments:

sprogblogger said...

You are allowed to go into yourself. It sure sounds like the exhaustion has you by the throat, and I think it's a good thing. Not that I wish exhaustion on you, but it's such a good sign. Monday is your next U/S? Shall be stalking and thinking of you near-constantly til then...

Mo said...

yes, baby, be in there, healthy, heart beating, in there. We're all counting on it!! sending you peace and good thoughts as the next u/s approaches. keep taking good care of yourself. with you.

mo

Elizabeth said...

Hi Kate -- sounds like a baby to me; I had that same time of coming and going queasiness, just when I thought it was really going to get me it would ebb, and then it would come back. . .. And I remember the tired. Coming home and just sleeping. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you an easier Sunday night than the last time, and a good reassuring scan, and a quiet week. With love,
Elizabeth

Melissa said...

I had that too. It was so frustrating! I was so tired and all I just couldn't sleep I would just lay there eyes wide open. Hope you start feeling better soon. Sour things and lemon really helped me with the nausea.

Maredsous said...

Hang in there sweetie. Everything sounds right on track. Thinking of you and knowing that all will be well on Monday.

Baby Smiling In Back Seat said...

I'll be thinking of you and that little gummy bear on Monday. Good luck!! Hope you can find the calm version of the exhaustion.

Joannah said...

Hoping and praying for you, friend.

I hate those insanedreamsleep things. Had a night like that on Thursday night. It's stress, I'm sure.

Looking forward to hearing good news from you soon.

:)

Kate said...

All the symptoms sound promising to me. Hope you see an even more wnderful baby on Monday!

Jules a.k.a. Julie said...

Thinking of you and your appt tomorrow. I'm confident all will be well!

Michele said...

Keeping you close to my heart and in prayer...

IF Optimist, then... said...

Just sending so much hope and love for more great news and a little happy fluttering heart to watch tomorrow.