28 July 2009

10dpo

I am all fragile crapitude
skinned raw emotional knees, throat-choked, heavy arms and heavy hearted... feeling bruised.
5$ says it is pms
but, as I recall, to my surprise I did feel like this when I was pregnant, so maybe......

hopeful and sad and fragile and
gosh darn

a cramp like distant thunder and I thought MAYBE????

OY this stuff is NOT for the faint of heart.

14 comments:

just me, dawn said...

kate- be brave :)
fingers crossed

Sprogblogger said...

Nothing - and I really do mean almost nothing in the WHOLE WORLD - is worse than the am-I-aren't-I? insanity of the 2ww. Hang in there. I'll be haunting your blog til you test.

Of course, I always haunt your blog, so that's nothing new.

Thinking of you.

Mad Hatter said...

What a beautiful, visceral poem. When you can't hope anymore, I will hope for the both of us.
XOXO

Eileen said...

I keep thinking good thoughts for you! Love your poetry!

IVF 40+ said...

Sure there is some wise eastern poem I could quote about now. It's all so hard right now. maybe this is the flip side of a care free summer?
sending you sticky vibes

Megan said...

Hang in there. Waiting and wondering and dreaming and preparing for disappointment is so hard. No one should be expected to do it every 28 days. sigh...

B. said...

Hang in there, Kate! I'm hoping and wishing so hard for this to be YOUR cycle.

Mo and Will said...

Ah Kate, the hell of the 2ww is unparalleled. Thinking of you. And sending thoughts of peace and strength.

Mo

meinsideout said...

Pure torture and I am sorry that you are in the middle of it. Hoping so hard for a bfp to wake up to tomorrow morning...

Michele said...

please let it NOT be AF...

hugs and warm thoughts...

twoweekwait said...

No this stuff is not for the faint of heart. We are a brave bunch, us IF sisters. *hugs* I am thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers.

What IF? said...

Beautifully written, as always. You are almost through the 2ww, and facing the most excruciating part now, but I know how strong you are. You can do this.

IF Optimist, then... said...

My brain is all mushy and angry. I just wish I had a crystal ball. I just wish...I don't know. I just want some good news for you, for me, for all. I'm off to find a good bit of music to play for you. At midnight I'll fill my heart with Wednesday Wishes.

Grade A said...

Dante didn't even know this ring of hell...

Sending you strength and hope.